BDSM dungeon parties explained

 

When exploring different BDSM practices, at some point you will encounter the concept of BDSM parties and BDSM dungeons. If you are wondering what is a sex dungeon or what happens there, this article is for you! Below we will talk about BDSM dungeon parties and explain all the rules you need to follow there. 

 

What is a BDSM dungeon party?

A BDSM dungeon party is a public kink event that brings together those who enjoy BDSM play. While some people prefer to keep the play inside their bedrooms, some dominants and submissives want to take it out and feel like a real part of their local BDSM community. Before attending a dungeon party, you need to have an understanding of different BDSM practices and gain some experience with them, but this won’t be enough. BDSM parties entail the vulnerability of people who visit them and their personal details, so there’s a great deal of trust, transparency, and respect involved in these parties.

That’s why you should learn all the BDSM house rules that you need to follow at a dungeon party and find out how to prepare for the event. 

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What should I wear to a dungeon play party?

In most cases, there are no strict dress codes at dungeon parties but you should avoid wearing casual looks. Attending a BDSM club is a special occasion, so your outfit should look stylish and sexy. When in doubt, wear dark or black clothing. You can also wear suitable lingerie, a corset top together with a skirt, or a set of leather BDSM accessories from Anoeses - it is up to choose something that puts you in a playful mood. You can also add a geeky or gothic touch to your look if it feels right. The bottom line is that you shouldn’t wear something excessively provocative but also leave your usual clothes for other situations. 

The do’s and don’ts of dungeon parties

As mentioned above, not knowing what is and isn’t appropriate behavior at dungeon parties can lead to unpleasant situations and conflicts. Remember these tips to make your dungeon party experience memorable and exciting:

Do: Pay attention to your surroundings and think twice before disrupting others

If you see a scene in front of you, don’t get involved in it and don’t disrupt it. After all, you don’t have an idea of what is happening and what the relationship between the people in the scene is just by quickly looking at it. BDSM dungeons aren’t places where everything is allowed and things happen spontaneously. You should respect others and only get involved when the scene is obviously over or if you ask for permission. Also, be sure not to interrupt aftercare, as it is a vulnerable and reflective process for those who were already involved in the play. 

Do: Be open-minded 

People have different kinks and it is necessary to respect any play scenarios when you’re at a BDSM club. You may enjoy watching the things that are happening or you may find it extreme and inappropriate for you. But if you don’t like what you see, just don’t watch the scene. It is very impolite to impose your vision on someone else at a BDSM party. Other people came there to enjoy themselves too so they can do it in any way they want. 

Do: Ask questions when necessary

You shouldn’t assume that you understand what is happening in a scene at a dungeon play party. As in private BDSM play, communication is vital for making everything work. Don’t be afraid to ask questions when you see that other people are not busy. Also, keep in mind that some submissives aren’t allowed to speak without permission, so you may need to address their partners to clear everything up. 

Don’t: Touch people and their belongings without consent 

One of the most common mistakes dungeon newcomers make is not asking for consent. They think that other people don’t mind being touched or are willing to share their belongings. But remember, the toys they use are their property and you should always ask permission before touching them or getting involved in a BDSM scene with someone. 

Don’t: Ask for real names 

Many people who attend BDSM parties want to stay anonymous because outside of clubs they have their professional reputations or relationships with friends and family to worry about. They want to keep their real names a secret and you should respect it. Never ask people for their real names because you will come off as intrusive. Also, don’t assume that the physical representation of people matches the way they want to be called. Refer to a person by the name they prefer. 

Don’t: Go to a dungeon party alone 

It is better to have company when you go to a dungeon party, especially when it is your first time. Take people you trust with you. Ideally, this should be a small group. A good practice is to talk about your personal rules and what to do if someone from the group feels uncomfortable or nervous in advance. Going to your first dungeon play party with close people will surely make your experience much more pleasant and comfortable. 

If you are not sure if dungeon parties are your thing, you can also do some research - watch videos of dungeon parties online and get ideas for BDSM scenes at the same time. In reality, the parties you attend might still look a bit different and it is ok to feel a bit uncomfortable the first time you go. Keeping that in mind, if you’re interested in the BDSM lifestyle, you should try to be brave enough to attend at least one dungeon play party because there is no other way to learn if you like them. If public kink is not your thing and you want to keep your BDSM practices private - it is perfectly normal too. 

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